Accept You For You

When we think of acceptance, we think of how others will accept us or how we will accept them. But that should be a given, an automatic response when meeting someone new. Why do we feel that others have to work to get our acceptance? At the same time why do we feel we have to be someone other than ourselves for others to like us? It should be as simple as a handshake. If we can trust again we can have wonderful friendships again. But how do we get to that point that we can trust others? Well we have to start with trusting ourselves. It all starts within, and if everyone decided to change that part of themselves; imagine what the possibilities would be. We need to start to think of how we will accept ourselves. We have to let go of all the negative outside influences; all the things that people say, all the looks and what not that make us feel less than the best about ourselves. We have to let go of all of the pain and anger that those influences have caused us. It’s hard to let go of that pain, but it’s more worth it than you can even imagine. It starts with realizing that those things about you that others point out, is what we most dislike about ourselves. It is our own subconscious working against us. Because as much as we want others to accept those things about us that we do not, they cannot accept them until we do. We have to realize that all of the things that we "hate" about ourselves are what make us who we are; they are what make us beautiful.

Let me tell you a little about me. I'm 27 yrs old, I'm 5 ft 6", and I weigh over 200lbs. I have extremely pale skin, so pale that doctors have no trouble finding a vein because they are visible through my skin. I have sensitive skin so it’s almost always broken out one way or another in one place or another. And the brake outs tend to lead to shingles from time to time, depending on my stress level. I have very thin fingernails so they are always falling apart. I have a very miss proportioned body with large thighs an even larger rear end with slightly small (C cup, but looks small on my body) breasts and a”muffin top” tummy. I have dark brown hair with lots and lots of streaks of gray; which is something genetic that I get from my father. The overall structure of my body is like a man's with broad shoulders, wide hips, and big feet.

Those are just a few of the things about me that I have disliked about my body over the years for one reason or another. But I have realized that I can't really change those things. I mean sure I could get liposuction, dye my hair till it falls out, and get a spray tan, but what is the point all that wears off one way or another. And then I'd be back to the same old me, so why not accept it now. So I let go of the pain and the anger that all of these things have caused me. I don't always like them, but I accept them as part of who I am big feet and all. "Would a rose smell as sweet, by any other name?"—Shakespeare knew what he was talking about. The women he wrote about and had in mind for his plays were all different shapes, and all shades of beauty. We must realize that our beauty on the outside is linked to our beauty on the inside. Others see us as we see ourselves. There are a few that are able to look through our own hatred and barriers, and love us more than we can ever love ourselves. And those are the people that we must learn to hold on to.

Besides no matter how much I change on the outside that would change me on the inside, but not always for the better. That’s why there are movies of “the dorks or losers” becoming Prom King or Queen. But you can have many different results, you can have Carrie or She’s All That. It’s your choice, when you get what you want, how will you react. I could gain beauty on the outside and become vain and selfish on the inside. Or I could choose to first love myself on the inside and see my beauty as it is on the outside.  What will you feel on the inside about what is happening on the outside.  I would not be the person that I so dearly enjoy being, if I did much of anything to the carrier of my soul. I have come to think of my body as a temple and it houses the greatest Goddess I know, me. Not to mention that what I've gone through because of the way I look has made me the strong and independent and wonderful woman on the inside. All of the teasing, the dirty looks, the fat jokes and everything else that someone else used to hurt me, has given me the courage to stand up and say, I love who I am and now you may love me too. For me, the only thing I will ever change is to enhance my health, or to further decorate my body, that's it. Because I am who I am and I love who I am, grey hair, fat rolls, big butt and all. We should also take a lesson from Popeye, "I am what I am, I'm Popeye the Sailor Man" toot toot. Lol.

I know that it is a hard road to acceptance, but take it one flaw at a time and see the beauty in it. That will help you find your acceptance.